Design thinking isn’t just for designers. I will walk you through the steps I take to empathize with the customer—and give them them the product information they need to make an informed buying decision.

Project: Write product copy for a dry firing system for an e-commerce website, but the input given to me to base the copy description lacked context and the necessary information a customer would need to make an informed buying decision

An Exercise In Customer Empathy

Original Product Description: Strikeman Laser Firearm Training System

The Scenario
The merchant pasted this vendor’s product description into our PIM system for me to write a thorough description for this $200 Strikeman product. The copy request also listed a variety of pistol, rifle, and shotgun calibers in the specs area.

After reading the vendor’s description, I had difficulty understanding how this product worked. Furthermore, the product features (which are really benefits) are listed toward the bottom of the presentation instead of at the top of the PDP. In the “what’s included” section, it lists a “Strikeman Laser Bullet.” But when I entered the sku number into our internal system, none of these additional calibers were listed. So my first question was, “which caliber comes with this kit?”

“The back of the laser bullet has a rubber button pad that safely absorbs the impact of the firing pin and triggers the laser to strike when the gun is fired. The cartridge is 100% safe for your firearm, and will not damage the weapon during use.”— Strikeman Product Description

It wasn’t until I read the above sentences that I realized the product is used with your existing firearm. And reading customer reviews from various websites also confirmed that you needed to own a firearm to be able to use this product. Yet that important fact was nowhere to be found within the vendor copy description, nor the copy request itself. It was clear as mud that I needed to fill in the gaps.

Research Steps

I started my initial research on the vendor site. I read various customer reviews and downloaded the View App Instructions to better understand how the App interacts with the rest of the components, to determine which phone models are compatible with the App, how the App actually functions—and if there was a cost associated with downloading the App. I then researched reviews on the App Store, plus read through customer reviews to glean insights from the customer’s point of view—as I often learn important details that aren’t apparent in the vendor-supplied details.

I then researched the product on Amazon well-knowing that  61%of US consumers begin their product search on Amazon. Often, a vendor will provide more contextual information on its Amazon PDP than its very own website, so I often use Amazon as a secondary resource. I also use Amazon as another VoC resource tool since I can comb through customer reviews.

What I Learned

On Amazon’s e-commerce platform, the Strikeman System is sold as a kit, which includes the cartridge. I also learned that the customer could choose from a variety of cartridge options to make it compatible with their existing firearm (screenshot below).

I was even more confused after seeing the variety of “styles” to choose from. Sportsman’s Guide uses its data entry system to automatically populate the dropdown menu on a PDP web page. And since I didn’t see any caliber options listed in the system, that probably meant:

1. There are no caliber options to choose from
2. We may be selling a one-size-fits-all version that doesn’t require different calibers
3. The options have not yet been uploaded into the system, but will be added later
4. There’s an unknown reason that was not yet apparent  

As the copywriter for this PDP and advocate of the customer, I knew that if I was confused, the customer would also be confused if I didn’t attempt to answer these questions.

Next Steps: I reached out to our internal product team to clarify:

1. If we would be carrying pistol, rifle and shotgun options to go with this product
2. Which components are included in the system we are selling (The Amazon PDP listed Strikeman Laser Cartridge, Target, Smartphone Holder, Access to the Strikeman App)
3. Is the Strikeman App free, or does it cost money to download?
4. If there are cross-sell items to complement this item and what are those skus?

What I learned from the Product Manager’s Response:

1. While Amazon was selling the system as an entire kit, our e-commerce site was selling the cartridge options separate from the main unit
2. What was actually included in the system?: Strikeman Laser Cartridge, Target, Smartphone Holder, Access to the Strikeman App. Cartridges sold separately
3. The App is free. There’s a code in the box to download the App
4. I was also given the corresponding skus that I would include for cross-sell purposes

The Final Output

Here’s the final copy description written after conducting the above research. You can also view the final copy in the PDF viewer (bottom of page) along with annotations explaining why I made certain copy choices within the PDP.

Compared to the original vendor description, I believe my copy description does a better job of:

• Describing what this system does
• Providing benefit bullets at the beginning of the PDP rather than burying them at the bottom of the page
• Detailing what’s actually included in the system and what’s sold separately
• Providing a better explanation of how the App functions with the overall training system
• Listing the laser cartridge sku numbers for optional purchase, making for an easier cross-sell experience

The Outcome

As of June 28, 2023, of the 52 customers who purchased this product at Sportsman’s Guide, there have been zero returns. I believe this is due to providing a clear product description, detailing what’s included in the system and what is not. And as of June 28, 2023, I did not read any customer complaints about this product description. As a research writer, digital marketer, and customer advocate, I believe that a better description does increase customer trust—which in turn increases customer loyalty—and customer lifetime value.

Pasted below are screenshots of the final description with annotations describing why I made certain copy choices.